Toilet Gas (It's not what it sounds like)

So I have a maid come in twice a month to get in all the corners that an eligible bachelor doesn't get around to. There's nothing quite like a freshly laundered bed that you don't have to make, but that's beside the point.

She visited the loo and decided to cover up what she had left in there, so she gave it a liberal spray with a random canister that (to her credit) looked entirely like some kind of air freshener.

Then she knocked on my door, showed me the canister, and said that it was "a bit strong". Nonsense, I thought, this looks like air freshener. I strode confidently into the loo, and immediately my face, nose and eyes started burning.

After an hour or two of open doors, fans blowing and hands waving, we managed to get rid of the offending gas. Just got off the phone with my mum, and it turns out that my cousin (a cop) had randomly given us tear gas in the very distant past. My mom had been searching for it for years, but apparently had neglected to try the place with all the tear gas-y canisters lying about.

So I can now add "being tear-gassed" to my life experiences.

Oh, and in Disney news - total fail with the CRC. Even the man in charge claims ignorance and computer error and I'm too lazy to chase it up, but at least I've now sent my clearance form to Disney.

The Saga Continues

It's going to be VERY difficult to positively "represent" this country if I'm asked about the police service.

If you recall, I first sent my clearance application on Feb 15, 2011. I called twice, first about 3 weeks after, then on Mar 15, 2011. Both times, they told me very clearly that it had NOT arrived, and was likely lost in the post.

So on Mar 15, I paid a hefty price to have another application couriered to the Clearance Centre, and it arrived there on Mar 16, no problem.

Until today, Mar 22. And what do I have in the post? A clearance certificate, DATED MAR 14, 2011.

So essentially, the police service LIED to me, twice, and put me out of pocket. Is that not fraud? So now I'm on the warpath (cue dramatic music). Emails have been sent! Calls have been made! I know I'll never see my money again, but I won't rest until I have an apology, and hopefully a sacking for the corrupt/lazy individual in question.

The Police Service's standard day.

So Disney tourists - my advice is to never mention the people running my country, unless you want to be on the receiving end of a tirade.

I'm going to sulk now (good luck to everyone starting today).

Triple Facepalm

On Thursday (March 10) I rang up the CRC (Clearance Records Centre, I think) to ask if my police clearance application had reached them.

It had not.

Bearing in mind I sent it on Feb 15, this was my first Facepalm moment of the week. I'll have to re-apply on Monday.

The second Facepalm came on Friday morning. A strange thunderstorm passed over. It was still sunny, and there was maybe 30 seconds of rain, but 2 massive thunderstrikes.

On the second strike, I saw an electric pop out the corner of my eye, and I'm offline. Yup, with no surge protection, my ADSL router had got itself fried, so I had to drop a not-inconsiderable amount on a replacement (plus an impressive-looking red surge protector).

The last Facepalm moment came earlier today, when I switched on my printer. It flashed a warning light like a raised middle finger and refused to do anything. Then I followed its cable to the plug point. Same as my router.

Well done, lightning, you struck twice in the same place. And my Disney savings are less because of it.